Monday, 18 October 2010

Teen Angst??? What about Mother Angst???

She's 13! Not 16,17 or 18!!! That's a fact!

She has a horrendous attitude, lies to me, hates her step dad, torments her brother, stays out drinking, has been smoking, swears and generally breaks my heart at every turn.

Is this my fault? Did I do something wrong? I don't smoke, I don't drink to excess, I spend every minute of my life with them, I'm fairly open minded, surprisingly easy to talk to, I protect them from everything I can, I love them with every inch of my being. So where did this go wrong? Will my children and subsequent children all turn out like this? Is it society?

I'm scared for my girl more than angry or upset. I'm them too but mostly scared of where all this is going to lead her. We've grounded her with a ban on her technology. Nothing seems to work.

Can you help me?


  1. Really sorry, I have no advice. It's scary though. I think I am a good mother and my daughter is a generally a good toddler but who knows what the future holds. I hope you manage to get this sorted. A positive would be that she's just turned 13 so she's just become a teenager and she'll have all sorts of hormones flying about the place. Fingers crossed this is just a faze and sounds like she could do with making some different friends as well.

  2. Oh I'm so sorry lovely :( I can't imagine how you must be feeling, I'm dreading the whole teenage thing, sometimes it seems there is nothing you can do :(
    She is only 13 though, hormones are a new thing, is there any reasoning with her? speaking honestly & openly about your fears? Can you use shock tactics?

  3. God you need a big hug right now.
    I have been through it with megan and the bad news is she will be like this anyway, she will continue and maybe get worse.
    the only way through to the other side is to be one step ahead of her as much as you can and let her think she is controlling her life but make sure you always know where she is, who she's with etc.
    I always, for what it was worth, talked to Megan, keeping open as many channels as possible. She probably thought I was an idiot back then but I persevered.
    You do get through it, I promise. And now Megan and I have a wonderful relationship, as she grows up she realises what a cow she was and how she harmed ehrself in the long run rather than me.
    Sorry it's long, do get in touch if you need to chat, Meg added quite a few rotten strings to my bow in her teens xx

  4. Thanks guys. Wendy she is so much better since she's been grounded and haad all privilages revoked. she's like a new girl. I'm sure as soon as she's out and about it'll be hell again. Although there will for sure not be as much freedom as she previously had. thanks Marisworld. i will update all in my letter and thanks for comment. Its sometimes just good to know that its not just me and that all mums of teenage girls have it to some degree. xxx


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